Swap favours for photobooths and only invite people you want, say those with the benefit of hindsight.
When you’re in the thick of it, planning a wedding can feel like a blur. With so many decisions to make, your poor brain doesn’t know what to do and you might make snap decisions you’ll later regret. ‘Yeah, sure – we totally need a ten-tier cake. £500 shoes – why not!’ It can come in handy to listen to those who’ve been there before.
I asked the recently married what they would do differently if they were to do it all over. Their answers ranged from how they would style the furniture to who they would invite. But there were some stand out themes.
1. It’s a wedding, not a free-for-all
Several people remarked that they had been too generous and suggested cutting back on some of the ‘freebies’ for guests, including food. Do your guests really need canapes, free-flowing booze, dinner, sweet trolleys and evening snacks?
Many said they would cut back on one or more of these courses to prevent wasting both food and money. “I wouldn’t have had the evening meal,” said Lisa, “Everyone was still full from the canapes.”
It’s worth remembering that people coming to your wedding are there to celebrate your union, not to clean up on the hospitality. Being selective with your offerings isn’t going to ruin your Big Day, as long as you have your nearest and dearest there with you.
2. Decide your wedding priorities and don’t scrimp on them
Former-Bride Michelle said she would ditch the favors for a photobooth and all night photography, preferring to capture the day and the guests from different viewpoints. Others shared this view, saying that good photography is a worthwhile investment.
Some said they wished they had spent more on decorations, or on purchasing their dream dress. After all, these are the details that will be captured in the photographs you’ll look at forever more.
Outlining on paper what your priorities for spending are from the start can help you to stay on track and ensure your Big Day is everything you want it to be.
3. Choose your wedding guests wisely
This is the crux for many past-Brides, who shared their biggest regret as having invited an extended guest list.
“I would have only had the people that I genuinely wanted there and not spent a fortune inviting people I didn't like or know just to please others,” says Nicola, a sentiment echoed by many more.
It’s not always easy to cut back on the guest list, but remember it’s your day to look back on and your memories (and photos) should be filled with those people that you love.
4. Remember why you’re having a wedding
If you’re getting bogged down in the details of placecards, tiebacks and confetti don’t forget to look up every once in a while and remember what it’s all for.
“I would have focused on the fact I was getting married, not having a wedding,” says Katie, “I would remember it was because I want to be married to this man, not because I want a big wedding. Close friends who are super happy for you are all you need.”
None of the details, big or small, should matter as much as the person you are saying ‘I do’ to. So don’t forget to enjoy the process together and you’ll be well on the way to wedding (and marriage) success.